"I can't believe this is happening again"
A few years had passed since
CJ's death and I met a man who I thought was my soul mate. In November of 1991, I gave birth to another little boy (Dylan).
I had complications during childbirth and as I was about to deliver him I had to have an emergency C-section. As they were
putting me under, I remembered saying, "please God... I don't care what happens to me, just don't let anything happen to my
baby"! I woke to find I had given birth to a beautiful little boy. In all my wildest dreams, I could not believe I could ever
be that happy again.
Sunday, January 5th 1992, 1 week from the anniversary of CJ's death, Dylan was 7 weeks old; I
woke to find him not breathing. He was rushed to the hospital where he would later be pronounced dead. Dylan died of SIDS.
I don't remember much of that day or for the months to follow except how much my heart ached. I was a zombie, just a shell
of a person wandering aimlessly. How in the world could this happen to me again? After a while, I tried somehow to find a
reason to go on. I forced myself to believe that I guess it was better to have had him for 7 weeks than to have lost him at
birth. It was the only way I could cope. (Continued on page 4)